Insults and Accusations

My husbands partner and one of our dearest friends, John, recently commented on what a "sanguine couple" Jess and I are. That sounded like a compliment until I heard he used his observations of our chronically messy home to backup his theory.

As I contemplated this I realized deep down I view myself as a as a cleaning perfectionist like my mother, but in actuality Johns right, I've only inherited half of my mother's over zealous cleaning trait: the mental half.

I practically obsess about a tidy house. I nag and complain with the best of wives, but that's about where it ends. I almost feel liberated as I write this next line:

I am a terrible house keeper, and not that fabulous of a homemaker in general. While I probably own a more extensive collection of organizational/cleaning books than the public library, my laundry continues to threaten take over and the pizza shop knows me by name. But, I think I can be okay with, I think.

Now I have theories. I think somewhere deep in my subconscious I have some morphed unrealistic ideal of a homemaker and "good" mother. This an ideal that matches up with my core beliefs or values and yet it seems to influences my very self concept. Leaving me with guilt and grouchy feelings that often cause everyone else grief as well.

I met with a physiologist recently who asked me to go home and reevaluate my ideals and goals and see if they match up with what I really believe to be truth. Everyone should do this every now and then, to make sure they're heading on the path they mean to be on.

I won't give up on trying to be a better homemaker for my sweet family who needs clean clothes and nutritious meals, but instead recognize where these things fall on my priority list. I've been trying to remember my morning prayers and ask what would be most important for me to spend my efforts doing that day.

Time and time again I feel the most important things, are things that will encourage feelings of love, and joy for our family. This sometimes includes cleaning and errands but even then my focus is on keeping the Spirit, and having joyful moments with the kids. I realize when my goals of a well run home are first on my priority list, everything seems get out of sorts. It's not that those activities are a problem, but rather my goals. I can do those activites with the goal of helping my family feel my love, and hopefully through this feel and recognize Heavenly Father's love for them as well and the way I feel at the end of a day is drastically different than how I feel when my goal is a show ready home. Especially because that's really not possible with these little rascals at my heels all day There's a reason there are not children in those show homes! :)

I love writing out my thoughts, it helps me put things into even better perspective. Writing things down also helps me remember but, nothing helps me remember to put this lesson into action as asking the Lord what he would have me do with my day each morning, if only I could remember to do that everyday! :) Maybe I need a prayer rock at the foot of my bed, so I stub my toe.

Picture of Jesus

Kids conversation this morning at the table:

Ky: Bridge do you love me.
Bridge: Yes I love you.
Ky: Well some people love me and some people don't.
Bridge: I love you Kyanne.
Ky: Bridgey, I'm drawing a picture of Jesus.
Bridge: Jesus? I love Jesus! He's my favorite.
Ky: He has two eyes, and a mouth...

(They are precious little ones. I feel so blessed to be able to spend so much time with them each day.)

Another Edition of "He Said, She said. . ."

The "He said... She said..." Series started as a way to keep a running list of memorable phrases I have priveledge to during the day. Here's this weeks.

Bridgey (exact quote): "Mom! I'm going to have the Biggest Boy Part, when I'm big like my dad!" (Lately he and Ky have this thing about having the "biggest" or being the "fastest", it's driving me a little nuts, but at this moment it was pure humor.

"Look, I pop Kitty in the eye" followed by a poke, poke, to the puppy's eyeball.

A disheartened Bridgey cry followed by "I have toilet paper stuck to my bum"

What do you want to name your puppy? "Kitty!"


Kyanne: after we got the dog, she asked if we could "keep her forever, even when we go to Heaven and live with Heavenly Father and Jesus?"

And, last night, she just blew me away when I asked her if she knew who Satan was during my family home evening lesson. Her answer was so amazing and detailed that I asked her to stand up and teach that part of the lesson for me. I was floored. Thanks primary (church) leaders and teachers. What a wonderful blessing you are to us and our little ones.

Hearing her detailed response helped me realize how much she does listen and take in. I feel so encouraged and responsible to really take the time to be teaching her these important things that will help her through life. It made me think of this scripture in Proverbs.

"Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it."
Proverbs 22:6

Welcoming a new edition. . .

As if life wasn't chaotic enough it, we decided to throw a puppy into the mix for good measure! It was Jess's choice really, Baby or Puppy? He opted for Puppy. And, as it turned out we got the best of the best. Her name is Blue Kitty (she's Bridgey's puppy, so he got to name her) and she's 1 year old this month. She's potty trained, knows commands, sleeps through the night, registered and has all her shots! It's like we skipped the puppy stage, but she's still the size of a puppy and as playful as one too. She's a little Fur Ball of Heaven.

Welcoming little "Blue Kitty"

Night Terrors

"Waaaaaaa-" come the gut wrenching crys from downstairs. Assuming the worst (bunk bed fall, broken limb) I bolt down the stairs to find Bridgey thrashing around at the edge of his bed, eyes open, and in hysterics. Assuming he'd had a bad dream, I try to hold him and say, "it's okay Honey, Mommy's here" but this just prompts a new bout of cries, "Mom, mom, MOm!" still no recognition that I'm right there trying to calm his wriggling body.

It's pretty terrifying to say the least. I've read all abou them online but, it still seems so sad and I have a hard time not trying to comfort him, despite the online advice. Has anyone else dealt with this?

Winter Recap; The variety Pak

Here's my cheaty catch up post for all the posts I meant to write but didn't this Winter.

Most memorable events of Winter 2008/09:
With a just over a million-plus hours and alot of gut wrenching hard work Jess got his Private Equity Group really moving this winter. Lucky for us he hired two assistants for help at the office, and can be home a lot more. But still we found time to have fun as a family, and a couple and I'm really looking forward to this Spring when there will be even more time.

With all the time inside this xtra snowy winter, Bridgey discovered games! He loves them all. He also is head over heels for any four legged friend he happens upon. Horses, dogs, kittys, they all elicit this excited, high pitched "Ooohhhhh", it can make even the grouchiest mommy smile. And, lucky for me he's still my Mama's boy. Which gets a little tricky with Fin being a Mama's girl. In the end, I spend a lot of time in the reading chair with 3 little ones shoving and squirming to be closer to mom. On the one hand it drives me to distraction and on the other, I'm kind of flattered.
Fin started talking right at about 12 months. Saying words such as "Up, down", "Please", "Uh-oh", "I love you", and of course "Uh-oh Bum!" She just toddles after her brother and sister, and keeps up surprisingly well. Bridgey and her go at it every few min. and I'm so thankful that I have Ky who helps keep the peace. Fin's favorite toys right now are purses and dolls. She gets a high pitched squeal when she see's dolls or real babies, it's so cute, since she herself is still just a baby.
Bridgey and Ky have became the best of friends. If they spend a few hours apart the reunion is momentuous. Hugs, Kisses, and "I missed you"'s all over the place. Nothing quite warms my heart like witnessing the love between my little ones.

Ky has grown into such a nurturing, peaceful little Mommy at age 4. She watches the kids for me several times a day. Of course I'm just up a floor or down a floor tending to something else, but her help is invaluable. She knows when to come get me and when she can handle the situations with Bridge and Fin herself. She encourages Fin and Bridge to be more kind to one another by her example of kindness and I couldn't ask for a more precious first child. Heavenly Father really blessed my life when He sent me Ky first.

Kyanne has really loved preschool. Yesterday she just started writing letters out of the blue. I didn't even know she could recognize those letters, let alone write them. I try practicing letters with her but she seemed unintrested, until yesterday when she just busted out 6 letters all on her own. Her teacher says she likes to talk more than any of the other kids. Her stories are long and detailed, I guess the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.

This winter we went to Golden for the weekend with some other families. The kids had a blast staying in the log cabins, and taking skiing lessons up at Kicking Horse. The boys snowboarded all day, while the moms and baby's tried to stay warm and entertained in the Lodge. It was a dream I've heard Jess talk about for years. And, I really look forward to getting our own cabin so we can spend even more time together playing as a family and playing with friends in the snowy mountains.
We also spent two weeks at Grandma and Grandpa Larsen's house in Raymond while the basement was being developed at home. It was really fun. I was surprised at how much fun I had away from home with 3 small kids. After a few days the kids really settled in and they just couldn't get enough of their grandparents. Towards the end I could tell our visit was really interupting Mo's sleep, as the kids all get up in the night and she has a hard time falling back asleep once woken. So I thought it best to make up a reason to return home early, even though our house was still in a shambles do to renos. But, Dick saw through my secret plan and called me on it.

Meggie got engaged! And, I'm really excited to welcome Jorge into the family. He fits wonderfully and he's her perfect match. She just got her sparkily ring this week and her dress a week or so before that. It's been super fun watching them from the start, and now planning the wedding! Hooray for Tia and Tio Cano. Here's Meg trying on my Wedding dress her real dress is loads prettier.



















Jess bought a second snowmobile and the Kids are crazy about it. Ky told Heavenly Father how much she loved Daddy's new snow-mo-ble in her prayers tonight. Here's some pictures of the kiddos with dad.
I'm attending sewing classes taught by this wonderful semstress and friend in our ward, Marna. She's pretty hard core, and quite honest about our progress :). But it's wonderful because we really are learning quickly. I've never found a hobby I loved more or tried harder to master than sewing.
And, best of all this Winter, I feel like I've gain real friends again. I guess I just took it for granted always having been blessed with good friends. But, when I got married we moved Huntington Beach and being head over heels as I was for Jess, I didn't really take the time to make real friends, and after we had Ky we just kept moving around and I never felt settled enough to put in the effort. But, since moving to Calgary I've been blessed with so many good friends and I my heart is full. It just makes life complete. Women need friends. I love my Jess and three little ones but as perfect as they are they can't replace good girlfriends.
And, I have to add that I love the ward we are in. I've never really understood the meaning of a "ward family" until now. Today I gave a talk at church and just bombed! Really, I'm not trying to be humble, it was pretty all over the place, and still I felt happy afterwards. So, the secret is out, I'm a terrible public speaker.

With life being so happy, I have a naggy thought warning me to not get comfortable, as I must be due for a big heartache. But, 7 years later I'm still waiting. Each year my love for my babies and sweet Jess deepen and my gratitude for my blessings increase. I think it is because of the peace the gospel has brought into my life, I can be still. Knowing the Lord has a plan, brings me hope, even in hopeless situations.

As I have this thought that life is so good disaster must be around the corner, I realize we've been having disasters all along. And, because we have the hope of Heavenly Father's constant love and help, we may be sad or weary but we do not despair or fall into to hopelessness, and I'm so thankful for this. I just read a great talk by one of our church leaders on maintaining Hope. For anyone who has the time, it's such an inspiring read. Here's the LINK.

“Press forward with a steadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope, and a love of God and of all men. Wherefore, if ye shall press forward, feasting upon the word of Christ, and endure to the end, behold, thus saith the Father: Ye shall have eternal life.” 2 Nephi 31:20.

Awesome Website, check it out.

CLICK HERE FOR FAMILY FUN BLOG

I love the ideas on this site. Super simple and fun for the whole family.
Snow painting with squirt bottles, and using old fruit drink mixes for scrach and sniff paintings! Cute ideas for Easter Holidays.

Today you are you, that is truer than true. There is no one alive that is youer than you.

Like most my life this post is also late. So, Happy 31st Birthday Christy. You must know how loved you are, but if not you can look at these sweet pictures, of people gathered just for you. Happy Birthday.

. . . .(When she first walked up. "Surprise!")

Here is a super rad Birthday Hat, straight out of the 40s literally -minus the little stuft bird. I don't want to make everyone else feel bad, but I'm pretty sure it was her favorite gift. See, even Cathy wishes she had one (maybe for your bday).

Curse-ed Electronics!

Dying;// at death's door, done for, doomed, fated, giving up the ghost, moribund, on last leg, one foot in the grave;

It's like a parade of dying electronics. First went the freezer, then the flat screen tv (via Bridgey's help), dishwasher, deep freeze, camera (also via Bridgey's help), vaccumn, crock pot, stupid vonage phone, my sad little van, even my mixer started to catch fire while in use. It's an epidemic, virally contagious.

Good news is we get to get all new replacements. This week I replaced the phone, vacumn, and dishwasher. And, the dishwasher I replaced myself. It hasn't even leaked, or caught fire yet, I'm pretty proud.

The Luck of the Irish. . . and $1000.00

(My lucky St. Patty's Day: I won a $1000.00 gift card for Home Depot today. Isn't that crazy? The Fedx man came to my door this morning with a certified letter. Assuming it was a bill my first words were "Oh, no". To which the delivery man said, "maybe it's a check". "Yeah right" thought my brain, but my mouth smiled politely and closed the door. As it turns out the day I decided to submit my receit online to be entered in to win, I did!)

I can't wait to start shopping. I'm leaning mostly towards carpet in the living room, but then I could always buy 1,000 one dollar items instead, or 10 100.00 items, or 20 50.00 items, awh the endless possibilities!

I have always loved St. Patricks day. When I was 6, I saw my first real leprechaun. It flew across Mrs. Snows 1st grade classroom during story time. He had been writing us letters in green pen all week. Telling us if we were good for Mrs. Snow he would come visit us on St. Patricks day, and he kept his word. Just after lunch a flash of green light flew across the room, and all 20 kids flew after it. Until finally, Mrs. Snow snuck up and caught him in a glass jar. And, do you know what that little green man did? He turned right into a peanut shaped refrigerator magne before any of us could see what he really looked like. It was pretty disappointing when you were expecting to see a round minature person with a miniature green suit and cute red beard, but at least he left us his pot of gold which turned out to be exactly enough pennies for each child in the class.

Of course I couldn't wait to get home and tell my mom that I met a real leprechaun. She says I wouldn't stop talking about it for weeks, so she felt obligated to sit me down and have a "talk". Whenever my mom needed to have a "talk", it made my stomach turn even at age 6. In this "talk" she told me that Santa and Leprechauns weren't real. Double Whammy. I told her "I didn't care about Santa, but she was wrong about Leprechauns" and ran to my room crying. She says she still regrets that "talk" to this day. I think a bit of me does too. What's so wrong with believing in childhood magic as a little person. It's so fun.

Today I spent the better part of the morning educating my little children about Irish folk lore via youtube. We watched a few leprechaun cartoons and then got dressed in all green, and delivered cookies to the people at dad's office in our fabulously festive outfits. The kids are napping at the moment and I'm about to go catch a leprechaun for them to recatch tonight and set up a near by pot of gold (Reese's chocolates). I can't wait, I love this holiday!

Baby's Juice.

About a month ago Ky brought up something about her "Baby's Milk". (When she was 2 and I was nursing Bridge she became really interested in that part of the body that she called: "Baby's Milk". Jess and I thought it was funny, so we just went with it. We especially liked the term when she undressed a maniquen and then shouted across the store, "Mom she has Baby's Milk too!")

Anyhow, this is a two part story. Part one:
After Ky brought up her baby's milk Bridge decided he had some too but his were called: "Baby's Juice".

Part two of the story took place yesterday when he pointed at my droopy tummy and said, "Mommy's Baby's Juice". His honesty was funny and sad all in one!

"Can Heavenly Father see us?"

Kyanne: "Can Heavenly Father see us?"

Mom: "Yes. And, we can talk to Him whenever we want. When were happy, sad, scarred-"

Ky: "Yeah, we should talk to Heavenly Father when we're scarred, but not grown-ups. They just say 'Go back to bed.'"

In a flash I saw bedtime over the last 2 weeks. Ky accending the stairs for the 8th time, telling me she is scared. This is about the time my after-hours Mommy voice would kick in and say something really sympathetic like, "There is nothing to be scared of, Go-To-BED."

-Opps.

"I heart wallets" GIVEAWAY!

Look at this little sweetheart. I had so much fun doing the giveaway for her a few months ago that I thought I'd do another. For those who have been following Mia's story you can get a better update than I can give by going to her website.


And, to enter in the giveaway all you have to do to is leave a comment on the Help Baby Mia website, and for extra entries please help get the word out by posting about it on your blog.

To ENTER Giveaway Click Here: HELP BABY MIA

Perfect.

A friend asked me what it was like having 3 kids so close together. My initial response: "Hard". It was out of my mouth before I could catch it. But the truth is: it's more wonderful than I could ever describe and I'm happier and more content than I've ever been.

The year I married Jess I couldn't believe how very blessed I was to have found the gospel and my perfect match all in one lifetime. We moved to a little cottage by the water in Huntington Beach and life was bliss. Life was so happy I spent those first few years looking over my shoulder waiting for it to dissipate, but it never did. It just got better.

Two years later we we're blessed with our first baby: Kyanne. By the time she was 3 months old, I was surprised to find my capacity for love and happiness had expanded again. Of course in between all this there were little clouds like lost jobs, living with in-laws, unexpected $30,000 dollars of medical debt, and eating more .25 cent pies than we care to admitt.

When ky turned a year and a half, we bought our first home and were expecting our second. With so much instability in my past, having a real home felt pretty surreal. I spent that first summer in Raymond pregnant and hormonal. Worrying day after day that I wouldn't be able to love my new baby, so Jess gave me a sweet blessing of reassurance a few weeks before his birth. As it turns out, I like boys after all. The moment he was placed in my arms, I just sobbed, I loved him at first site.

7 months later I cried more joyful tears as I found out we we're pregnant with #3. Jess was understandably nervous, as our financial future had just crumbled, leaving us in ruins and without a home. I on the other hand was the good parent who wanted Finley from the start. Actually I was surprised at just how calm I felt. I knew the timing was right and I couldn't be more happy about another little girl. Now that little girl is a year old, Bridge is 2, and Ky is 4.

Today as I listened to Ky help Bridgey pray my heart was so full, I again wondered if this was all too good to be true, would I have some terrible trial to make up for having more than I had even hoped for. Every dream and secret wish I had as a child has come to fruition, making life truly perfect. Perfect -with all the trials, mishaps, and joys that have come along with it.

We've had plenty of tears, and growing pains along the way, but today I feel grateful for it all. I feel grateful to the Lord for allowing us to experience trials that shape, mold, and help us become closer to one another. Without the bad, we wouldn't recognize or be able to fully appreciate the good, so in this fleeting moment I'm grateful for it all.

And This To Shall Pass... we hope.

Tonight little Bridgey Bear swallowed a penny while in the corner doin' time. After the initial panic attack and desire to hide all small shiny objects, I called Jess to ask if he thought there was anything to do but wait. He agreed to just wait and see if the little copper treasure made a return.

According to my personal doctor -The Wild Wild World of Web: "A penny (or even a quarter!) can easily pass through the digestive tract and will probably do so within 24-48 hours." All you can really do is wait and go treasure hunting to make sure it makes it's way back out (fun!).

Renovating, Bo-bating, Bannana Fanna, Fo-fate'ing ...Renovating!

The past three weeks we've been renovating the basement. It started with a terrible two days of cleaning and clearing out, ending with two cheery trips to the dump. It felt so good to de-junk-a-fy my life and liberate the Inner Organizer within that I haven't been able to stop. Everyday I find more to donate to the: 'Trash' or 'Other Peoples Treasures' Box. I'm looking forward to tackling my closet next. I find in actuality I wear the same few shirts and pants over and over. The rest just tortures the small, organized part of me. If we end up going somewhere fancy I'll borrow or go buy something new, that's more fun anyhow.

Update on the basement, it took the contractor 2 weeks to frame, drywall and mud, in which the kids and I moved in with the grandparents. It was one of the nicest vacations I've had. We just relaxed down in Raymond, did some shopping, sewing and alot of visiting. It was lazy and perfect. Except for the part where the kids would wake Mo night after night with their nightly demands. Ky spent at least 1 of the weeks paling around with her best bud Maimie. And, the rest of the time paling around with Grandma. Grandma took her to see the play Peterpan put on by the 5th graders. Ky thought it was rivoting, Grandma fell asleep. Another night, we made homemade pizza at Jill's with all 7 kids (ages: 6mos to 5) with foolish plans of sewing. Good times Good times.

I'm hoping to finish painting the basement and get carpet laid in the next couple of days, we'll see how much I get done with Jess out of town.

PS: We had a FABULOUS contractor and electrician if anyone is looking. They were priced super well too.

Lesson Learned: Crying = Getting Your Way

• Ky: Is it important to cry?

• Mom: Yes sometimes it's good or 'important' to cry.

• Ky: Yeah, it is important to cry sometimes, when you want things that are not yours.

And, there you have it. It's important to cry when you "want things" especially "things that are not yours". All those times I stuck up for her thinking she really didn't understand and had hurt feelings, I was being snowed.

At least she's a clever little thing.

Is that Chocolate or Poop??

It was about two days ago when I ran up the stairs just in time to see Bridgey slam the bedroom door shut on Fin's tiny head. As I grabbed the baby to console her and her wounded noggin, I caught glimpse of the brown deposits along the carpet.

The scene from Baby Mama flashed across my brain, "Is that chocolate or poop?"

Sadly it turned out to be the latter. Poop that had been happily strean about and then smeared into the carpet when the door was hastily pushed across it. When I walked in Bridgey smiled proudly and said, "Look mom, I cleaning up." And, there I saw a pile of Fin's clothes being used to smashed more poo into the already sad looking carpet. I couldn't help but find some humor in Bridgey's proud smile, so after I snapped some pictures I took to antibacterlizing the carpet and scrubbing.

After all was said and I done, I let the kids know I was a break, and retreated to the bathroom, where I slid across the floor in a yellow puddle. Bridgey strikes again!

Obama's Inauguration

I've been wanting to post about Obama's inauguration for my own historical record but then I read this post on Cocoa's blog (Now See Here), and thought I'd just re-post hers since she did such a good job.

"I'm not about to say much else since let's be real, there's nothing that hasn't already been said. And who wants to read more about this anyway. So rather than wax poetic using my own poignant yet insightful words, I'll share some other people's who just happen to run countries..."

First, the usual flowery-ness...

UNITED KINGDOM
Prime Minister Gordon Brown

"The whole world is watching the inauguration of President Obama, witnessing a new chapter in both American history and the world's history. He's not only the first black American president but he sets out with the determination to solve the world's problems."

No Pressure dude.

FRANCE

President Nicolas Sarkozy
"We are eager for him to get to work so that with him we can change the world."

'So that we can change the world'...

Ah, France.

No further comments.

SPAIN

Prime Minister Jose Luis Rodriguez Zapatero
"Obama gives us hope and his words put us on a better path for a smooth and fruitful relationship with the Spanish government. The arrival of Obama gives us an opportunity we won't pass up."

Anyone who seriously uses "fruitful" in a sentence is a friend of mine.

And now for my favourites...

IRAN

Foreign Minister Manouchehr Mottaki

"We prefer to wait and see what the practical policies of the American government will be."

And now, how do you really feel?

RUSSIA

Foreign Minister Sergei Lavrov

"We are ready for this. Our president confirmed this in a telephone conversation with Barack Obama straight after he was elected. I think there will be additional telephone - and not only telephone - contacts between our leaders."

Russia is ready. There will be additional contact. He thinks. And not just on the phone...

Snap.

VENEZUELA

President Hugo Chavez "Hopefully the arrival of a new president will mark a real change in relations between the United States and the countries of the Third World, one of respect for sovereignty and the freedom of the people. But nobody here should be under any illusions. This is the North American Empire we are talking about."

Ahaha. Fair enough Hugo. FAIR. ENOUGH.

Side note - Canada's response is conspicuously missing since Stephen Harper was too busy tryin' to keep his job. Canadian politics were "exciting" like that for the first time ever so get back to him next week. Also, word on the street is Obama's first international trip is to Canada so somebody call up England and let them know that we're still America's best friend after all. We'll stop crying ourselves to sleep on our huge pillow.

Also, where can I get one of these?